Just returned from my honeymoon in Tuscany, and, as you would expect, am now interested in all things Italian: the food, the language, the land, the lifestyle, the siestas!

I'm reading "Under the Tuscan Sun" because we are going to meet the author in a few weeks. It's such fun to read the book and to now know some of the places she is talking about.

In the book she spend a lot of time on food. This whole food-thing is fascinating to me. I have eaten in some lovely restaurants in my time, but I have never enjoyed and appreciated food as much as when we were in Italy. Now that we are back I have taken to cooking authentic Italian food and have been thrilled with the results.

Just last night I made pizza from scratch - as in I started with flour, yeast and water. I didn't buy a naked crust and just add toppings. If I do say so myself...wow!! And how rewarding to hear approving comments coming from the kids. I used to make all of my bread back in my commune days, so it was great to reconnect with bread (crust) making - the kneading, stretching, rising. My favorite pizza was the one topped with marinated artichoke hearts, eggplant, homemade tomato sauce and real mozzerella (not the shredded faux-mozzerella in a bag). Oh, and torn up fresh basil, too.

Al (and now I) has a wonderful, huge backyard. I want to build/salvage/buy a huge, long table to put under the trees out there. We have wonderful neighbors... the kind that drop by for a drink and stay for dinner. It's very cozy, very lovely. How great to have feasts out there in the Spring/Summer/Fall...pulling things out of the huge vegetable garden I am planning. Peaceful. Relaxing. Rewardng. It's all about savorng lfe to me (can you tell that my i key is stickng?)

That's it for now. Off to walk off that extra slice of pizza I had last night. :-)

I am hanging on every word coming in from our o.net friends in Gulu , Uganda. Check it out. Can't wait to see the pictures afterwards.

Today is my birthday. 52 years old. Happily married for 5 (or is it 6) weeks now. Working on CancerKid and SickleCellKids every day. Life is good and I am grateful.

Speaking of gratitude, check out the personal news from my good friend, Mark Grimes. It is a wonderful accounting of his recent trip to Gulu. I almost feel as if I was there, too, after reading it.

[Edited by author: Cynthia Gentry on 06 Mar 2007 07:15 PST: added link]

WOO HOO 2 U !!!

:D nmw

Thanks, Norbie. And thanks for the birthday call, Anne Marie! Made my day ... well, that and the tiara the kids gave me to wear while I blew out my birthday candles!!

John Prendergast of International Crisis Group has started an interesting new initiative called ENOUGH. Check it out!

I added a button for Enough to my home page. (Thanks, Lars!) If you want to copy the code for your home page or website, click on the date stamp for this entry, then click on "plain text" and copy the code from that.

I was really inspired by a new website created by my friend and fellow o-netter, Lars Hasselblad Torres, Mixed Up Arts. I'm going to try to get the kids at CancerKid.org to make the mobiles and puppets he has there. VERY cool. Actually, collage would be a great thing, too. For that matter, so would Peace Tiles ...

While looking through Lars new site I was excited to find a link to Dan Eldon's website. His work is stunning; his story fascinating and tragic.

Also up today is a new group I'm putting together for WAM-Atlanta. That's Women Advancing Microfinance. It's a brand new organization in the Atlanta area and I'm thrilled to find this interesting community and very excited about bringing them all to O.net.

My goodness, it's amost noon. I've spent the whole morning on o.net. Haven't done that in a while, but it has been exciting and inspiring. It has also given me numerous ideas for my own work on CancerKid and SickleCellKids. Time well spent!

Have a great day. My goal is to keep crossing things off of my To Do list. Action feels great.

I just had one of those heart-lifting, eye-opening, spirit-soaring experiences (nothing half-way, baby!) I just discovered that the lovely Ms. Meron S'mores is heading to Lesotho ! She had given my new husband and me a wedding gift of art supplies for the kids in a small village in Lesotho and now it appears she is going to take those gifts to the children herself!!!

Meron is a rare and wonderful spirit and one of the many gifts I have received from being a member of Omidyar.net. She was given the gift of this trip by the rare and wonderful Ray and Jackie Brousseuk, also O.net members. The work that these three are doing blows my mind.

This past year I spent 6 months or so working for a company that does executive search for non-profits. I thought I was finally being responsible by earning a paycheck, having health insurance... all of those "shoulds." Well, yes, those are good and necessary things and came in mighty handy when I found myself in the ER one night, but I also lost something in the process. I lost my heart. And, not in the lovely way I lost my heart to my new husband. This was the bad way.

Now, this was a wonderful company doing important work. It was just not healthy for Cynthia. Their work is about evaluating people. Finding out why so-and-so is not good enough. You are constantly judging people based on what they have done, not on the content of their hearts. Yes, this is all necessary when evaluating potential employees, but for this soft Pisces artist it was spirit-deadening. I found myself becoming more and more judgemental; more and more impressed by status and title. I also got to the place where I was belittling myself for not being one of these high-powered executives. I was killing my spirit. And when that happens the quality of my work and life plummet.

I can only speak for myself here, and my experience in life has been that the only time my life works is when I am focused on love. Either the love of a person, the love of an ideal, the love for little children who are suffering. When that is my focus, things just always sort of work out AND I end up doing work I am proud of.

There is a poker chip on my computer keyboard. Around the edge of the chip it says "To thine own self be true." Do you suppose they really mean it? Here I am 52 years old and I am yet again relearning something I knew and had forgotten: that I can only be the best Cynthia I can. I can't be a Gillian Caldwell (WITNESS) or a John Prendergast (ICG) or a Pam Omidyar (you've heard of her, right?) I can only do what I can do. BUT when I do that with my heart open and full, then it is enough and I am at peace.

So, today, hearing how Ray and Jackie Brousseuk (sp?) made the trip to Lesotho possible for Meron, reminded me of how I want to live my life and where I find my joy.

Thank you, dear inspiring Omidyar.net friends. I call this kind of thing "spiritual chiropractic"! It just lines everything up the way it should be.

Rose Vines: Just heard from our long-lost friend Rose Vines that TOMORROW she and Lillie are moving back into their renovated home in New Orleans. She said it is only the third home on her street to be re-inhabited.

Best wishes, Rose. Sure do miss you on o.net! Hope that grand old tree in your backyard survived!

A few pictures from my trip to visit my son (and Rose!) in New Orleans. These were taken 2-3 months after Katrina in December 2005. So excited that she is now able to move back in at long last!

My son Jared and Rose in her gutted house in New Orleans.

The magnificent tree in Rose's backyard. I hope it survived!

On the way to Rose's house.

"Where did THAT come from?"

Water level clearly shown on house.

Sense of humor intact in New Orleans!

Disclaimer: I have a raging headache and a cold.

Grumpy comment: I read the other day that Oprah mentioned how much she liked John Travolta's $400,000 (no typos there) car...so he gave it to her. Now, I'm sure he does a lot of great things, but give me a break. Couldn't he have sold the car and given the money to a charity in her name?

Where is the line? How does one retain perspective in the face of great wealth?

A friend of ours, Linda Patillo, showed a film she made at the Atlanta Film Festival last night. Breast Cancer Diaries is about her sister-in-law's experience. It is a beautiful, moving film. This is not some maudlin, weepy tale, although there are tears. There's a lot of laughter, too. The editing is spectacular.

If you get a chance to see it GO!! Inspiring in an honest, real, non-rah-rah kind of way. I'll let you know if PBS picks it up.

OK, I admit it. I watched American Idol tonight. They raised over $30 million for all sorts of things including, I was thrilled to see, mosquito nets to prevent the spread of malaria.

Ubuntu: My humanity is tied to yours.

I rediscovered an old favorite discussion thread this morning and included in it is a wonderful post from the beautiful Anne Marie Bellevance (hope you don't mind me republishing it without asking, AM):

I think the holiday weekend has begun early! Atlanta is silent. Where'd everybody go? The twins are heading north with their Mom and new hubby and I are on our own for 10 days.

Have a fun and safe Memorial Day weekend everybody in the US.

Im spending some time working with my son on his new non-profit organization: Students In Training. He is so passionate about this. It is very inspiring.

Students In Training will work with high school athletes who have lost their place on their school team because of poor grades. They will work with tutors and counselors and as they do, they will earn time with professional athletic coaches and trainers. The idea is that as they grow as students they will also be growing as athletes.

So many kids lose all interest in school when they get kicked off the team. Their ability on the playing field is the only thing that gives them confidence. When you take that away there is nothing left to keep them to school. What is meant as an incentive ends up drowning them. With this program, they will not lose any ground as athletes, but will get the highest quality training (speed, agility, strength training, etc.) - better than most will receive in school. This will help keep them in school. As they work with the tutors and counselors, they will start developing the study skills and core knowledge to do well back in school and earn their way back to their team.

My son knows about this from personal experience. Eventually he was able to turn his life around, but many he knew did not and ended up in gangs, in jail, and worse. He wants to give the kids coming up now the break he didn't have and help make the road back to success much easier.

I am so proud of him.

Just saw Andrew Shue's new movie, "Gracie." Very inspiring, true story of his sister Elizabeth and their family. It's not playing many places, which is a shame.

Sort of growing away from O.net these days. Kind of sad. The early days were such fun and I gained so much. This place really expanded my horizons.

What do you find attractive about o.net today?

What do you find not attractive about o.net today?

What did you find attractive about o.net in the early days?

What did you find not attractive about o.net in the early days?

Is there anything you find repulsive about o.net today? (if so, what?)

Is there anything you found repulsive about o.net in the early days? (if so, what?)

(if you don't feel like answering any of these questions, then don't -- ;) -- just answer if/whatever you feel like answering ;)

Some musings on your questions: I've been working on those questions for some time now understanding that my feelings have a lot to do with where I am in my life now...which is far, far busier than when I first discovered o.net almost 3 years ago. Now I'm married, have pre-teen twins and my own son has moved back to Atlanta and I'm helping him start his program for student athletes. Plus, I received the wonderful Omidyar Community Favorites Award which has allowed me to devote my working time to CancerKid.org. Hugely satisfying! Hugely time consuming! There just isn't the time to explore here anymore.

When I arrived here I was starved for interaction such as I found on o.net. I was online ALL day long. Checking to see what Lars or Mark or Sue or Thomas was up too was the first thing I wanted to do each morning. I knew about almost every discussion that was going on. I was like a kid in a candy shop. Every day my mind was expanded by what I read on o.net. It was more than a school for me.

Now as I've learned and grown (due largely to my interaction here) o.net has too. Now it is impossible to keep up with everything going on. That is not a bad thing. Now there are many communities within the community. And, that is not a bad thing. It's just not as fun or safe as when it seemed like we all knew each other. This is not a problem with o.net. It's a problem with my perception. It's like sitting on the porch of your highrise condo longing for the days when you sat on your front porch swing and knew all your neighbors, their kids, their dogs and their cars.

I remember a year or so ago pondering if staying uber-active in O.net was a successful outcome for a member. For me it was all about learning and getting active so it made sense that success meant I had LESS time to spend here as I went out into the world and actually DID what I had been talking about. But, when I went away I missed the dear friends I stayed in touch with here. I missed hearing different takes on the same idea or problem. So, I changed the way I used o.net a bit. I started using it more as a tool for my work, posting about where I was on CancerKid, asking for feedback. Recently that too has required too much time as well and when I do dip my toes back in it is overwhelming!

Finally, (now realize this is coming from a gentle Southern Pisces artist) too often conversations aren't as congenial as they once were. Early on people went out of their way to see things from the other person's point of view, to find a middle road if there was a disagreement. It was all so very civilized (said with the thickest Southern drawl, y'all). I love different points of view, but am not all that crazy about mean-spirited attacks. Guess this is why I'm an artist and a writer and not a diplomat or CEO.

So, somewhere in those ramblings you might find the answer to some of your questions, Norbert. Guess I'm just wistful and longing for "the way things used to be." Maybe I just need some caffeine. :-)

thank you for sharing your insights, cynthia! my view of o.net continues to evolve - as a place to "get work done," and to encounter new people, ideas, etc and to seek support for smal to large efforts. have also become aware of my lack of attachment to where it seems to fall short of my expectations.

Thanks, also, Cyn!

Seeing as I thrive on interdisciplianary cross-fertilization, mixed-up confusion is totally "where it's at" and different modalities are also completely hunky dory for me. ;D I do not see things in black and white -- my world view is one big murky mass (and fluid, too ;). I also refuse to let anyone get me down. There are too many good things to achieve to get hung up on negativity.

Now I also realize that it might be perceived as though my opposition to big media were a case of negativity -- and I do have to work more on focusing on the empowerment of small media. The hurdle I have to get over on that count is the "traditional" view of "only big media matters".

A couple years ago, I was very critical of the cluetrain manifesto's argument that everyone is everyone else's audience (and other people opposed my criticism). Today, it almost seems like the general opinion is: there is only big media (almost an "about face" -- as if small media now all of a sudden doesn't even exist).

I can understand that your focus on your work might conflict with participation on o.net. In contrast, my focus on building networks/connections increases my participation on o.net.

:) nmw

Sure is hot down South! No air conditioning in the studio. Rough life, huh? -In case you don't know me, that was a joke. :-) -

You're right, Norbert. As the mood of the other day has passed and I've reflected more I since (yet again) that o.net is what you make of it/put into it. A time-availability issue (and the passage of time thing) is all that is going on here.

Thanks for checking in here.

Saw a lovely little Irish film the other day: Once. If I can make it work, here's a video of the two stars singing my favorite song live.

<embed src="http://www.vmix.com/flash/vmix_p layer.swf?skin_url=foxSearchLigh t.swf&l=0&type=playlist& amp;auto_play=false&lineup_u rl=http%3A//www.vmix.com/deamon/ playlist.php%3Faction%3Dget_play list_from_resourceid_list%26reso urceid_list%3D%7C2448456&pla y_url=http%3A//www.vmix.com/play lists.php%3Faction%3Dget_playlis t_from_resourceid_list%26resourc eid_list%3D%7C2448456&presen tation_url=http%3A//www.vmix.com /deamon/channel.php%3Faction%3Dg et_channel_presentation_data%26c hannelid%3D1695009" wmode="transparent" width="415" height="362"></embed>

Hmmmm...it's not working... hmmmm...????

Edit: Help! Anybody know what I should do here?

1. 2 semi-colons directly after raw
2. indent each following line of html

like this:

Cynthia Gentry said:

Saw a lovely little Irish film the other day: Once. If I can make it work, here's a video of the two stars singing my favorite song live.

[like of html :> line of html]