At the end of the month I will be traveling to Budapest to make a presentation to the Conference of the Buddhist Economic Platform.

I have posted the text of the presentation and would appreciate any feedback you might have.

Now to start work on the presentation for the Gross National Happiness Conference.

Almost 3 weeks ago now, I went into Bangkok and attended a lecture by Peter Hurst. Peter is the retired Vice President of Academic Affairs at Naropa University (The only Buddhist University in the US and in Boulder, Colorado of all places!)

After his retirement, Peter and his family came to Thailand for 6 months for Peter to have the opportunity to help Mahidol University set up a graduate program in Contemplative Education.

Deep community - contemplative education....weird things. But what did you expect? This is my personal news!

Contemplative education is a philosophy of higher education that infuses learning with the experience of awareness, insight and compassion for oneself and others through the practice of meditation and contemplative disciplines.

Contemplative education integrates the best of Eastern and Western educational traditions, helping students know themselves more deeply and engage constructively with others.

“The point is not to abandon scholarship but to ground it, to personalize it and to balance it with the fundamentals of mind training, especially the practice of sitting meditation so that inner development and outer knowledge go hand in hand. . . . A balanced education cultivates abilities beyond the verbal and conceptual to include matters of heart, character, creativity, self-knowledge, concentration, openness and mental flexibility.” —Judy Lief, former Naropa University president

These excerpts from Wikipedia give you a little better idea of what this concept is.

Deep community is a term that Dr. Hurst uses to describe community that provides you with the space and support to do personal work as the group does what ever tasks it has, be they learning as in contemplative education, or doing strategic university planning as in one of his lecture examples.

As he was defining this concept in the first lecture I heard, I realized that he was describing an Asoke community. For those of you who haven't been following my PhD work briefly, this is a Thai Buddhist community that has changed my life.

Since then, I have spent a couple of days with Dr. Hurst and I expect that over the coming years I will spend more. We invited him to visit us here in Ubon, give a lecture (to pay his way!) and go with us to visit a couple of Asoke communities. He agreed with my assessment and I believe he will be coming back to study how these communities work.

Dr. Hurst has provided a huge missing piece in my current jigsaw puzzle.

Sufficiency Economies are first and foremost economic entities. It is a form of development philosophy that provides safety and a mind set that can enable safe growth. With the child-headed households project at Opok Farms we want to provide that safety and springboard to future development for them. But how to do it for children? And not really just any children. Children who have been damaged with the war and with the effects of HIV/AIDS. Children who have been saddled with the responsibilities of adults. Persons who were one day children themselves and are the next day in charge of all of the littler ones in the family with no gradual build up that gives them time to acquire the necessary wisdom. We had realized the importance of finding the right adults to fill in this community. People who could in some sense act as parents to an extended family. I had realized the importance of intentionally building a supportive community. One where education had to be way more than the 3Rs.

Having a Sufficiency Economy community requires (I think) a change of perspective. You need to see the long range not just the short range. This philosophy is about understanding needs versus wants. It is about understanding how everything is interconnected - what happens to you, changes what happens to me; what you do to nature changes nature on the other side of the globe. Good concepts I think but not your typical "kid" mentality.

Where do we learn abut those concepts? Where do we learn good and bad and right and wrong? Mostly, I think (I think a lot these days and realize how little I know.), we learn them from our families. From those people who have gone ahead of us and experienced more and hopefully developed some wisdom. Sometimes those families are extended - sometimes all the way to a community - but that part is seldom recognized. How do we have children teaching values when they have little experience with living and no remaining role models?

So, yesterday I went out looking for information on values education. I found lots of stuff. I even found a lot of good stuff (Living Values - a program developed for the UN).

OK...like my life these days and like most good things I think, the path is not straight or narrow. We need to wander off across the plain of my work and look at the work I have been having to do on selecting a methodology for my research.

My previous education has all been in the hard sciences. This venture into the social sciences is a strange journey. I have had to go and study the tried and true research methodologies that have been used by other researchers in the social studies over the years. This helps define how you will approach your research; defines the style and helps focus on the techniques you will use and how you will frame your questions.

After a lot of reading I kind of felt pretty comfortable with Participatory Action Research. It's nice and fuzzy and instead of looking at a path that is a straight line from A to Z with all of the intermediate (B,C,D....) questions to be answered, it is more like wandering around in a spiral.You ask a question, contemplate it, figure something out, try it, stop, look and evaluate and start all over again. That sounds like it was designed for me! Perfect fit!

(take a long broad jump back to where we were before)

As I was laying in bed last night trying to put the clutter on the desk of my mind in some order so I could go to sleep, I realized that the main task ahead of me (us) in setting up a sufficiency economy farming community at Opok Farms is to build a deep community. A community where everyone is working together on projects (farming and what ever other businesses develop out of that) that will provide them some economic safety and basic security of existence while at the same time providing the children the support and a place where they can all do the self work involved in growing up, healing and becoming the most glorious people they can become. That requires looking at who the people will be who do that community building work. Ultimately, it will be the community itself, but who helps them learn the tools to do that? Are they active, full-time members of the community or are they outside support people? Where do they learn how to do this work?

I think it was Peter Drucker who said something like if it can't be measured it can't be managed. How do we measure progress in this work so that we know what needs to be tweeked when?

I think I have an idea to work on for the talk Aj. Apichai wants me to present an the 3rd. International Gross National Happiness Conference. Only a month to get that paper written....arggh...

Off to the faculty!

Linda ทรัพยากร Nowakowski - Thai TV star

ทรัพยากร is my new Thai name. My Thai students gave it to me and it means resource. It seems particularly appropriate as I teach graduate students when I am a graduate student myself. When all of your students have studied English for a minimum of 12 years, they need resources more than a teacher. They need someone to talk to and listen and correct not teach.

Right now though, I feel like I need some resources. Getting something done when everyone stops in to talk to you is impossible and I have at least a million important things that need to be done and really can't get done when I am being interrupted. I have to go to Bangkok for a planning meeting for the Moral Forum with the director of UNESCO on Wednesday and since I am not really needed here right yet, I think I will just stay in Bangkok for a few extra days and see if I can't get some papers written and a book of compiled reading resources for the course I Will start teaching the beginning of the month ready to copy on Monday.

Ajarn Sappayakorn - Teacher resource....works for me... :-)

This last week I went to Bangkok to attend 4 lectures - Dharmma talks - by The Venerable Thich Nhut Hanh.

I know...you are asking ...who the heck is that?

For me, when I came to Bangkok, it was the person who is most often quoted when anyone writes about socially-engaged Buddhism.

I found out much about him this week. He is a Zen Buddhist monk..I am still not entirely clear on what that means compared to say the Theravada monks here in Thailand or the Asoke monks or the Dali Lama. He is 79 years old and looks, moves and speaks at least a generation younger than that. He was born in Viet Nam and has live in exile in France (at the Plum Village) for many, many years. He came here with about 70 members of his Sangha - men and women about 50-50. He is an incredible teacher. When he speaks, you somehow feel like you are the only person he is speaking to. And he explains tough concepts with simple stories, humor and the most gentle demeanor I have ever witnessed.

The first talk that I went to was at the UN. It was by invitation only and I Was fortunate enough to get an invitation. At that talk, I think I met the only Ugandan Buddhist monk. He is currently living in West Virgina. (I know - Ugandan monks in a monastery in West Virginia...it's kind of surreal.) He spoke about staying in the moment; about compassionate listening and loving speech. I was entrapped.

The second talk was on Tuesday night at the Thai Chamber of Commerce University. He spoke of competition and jealousy and used an incredible analogy of his right and left hands.

I went to the scheduled talk on Wednesday at Wat Mahathat but it was canceled. I think someone had previously scheduled the space for a large group of nuns and no one had the heart to ask them to move or leave.

The final talk was on Vesacha Bucha Day - what he had come to Thailand to celebrate. I got an opportunity, thanks to my friend Victor, to help serve some of the French Sangha dinner. They were a joy. And the talk was amazing. I will let you figure out how he worked no car day and listening to the ones you love and giving them space into the same talk. Trust me, it worked. (http://deerparkmonastery.org http://www.greenmountaincenter.org/ http://plumvillage.org I will find the link to no-car-day ...my notes are in my office.)

I have been touched. Gently.

I got bored so for lunch I made new wallpaper: a collage of things on my mind.

If the food in Uganda weren't so totally boring....maybe if I took chilis? Nam Prik?

Christina and Mark ... I have found a source of inexpensive organic passion fruit juice!

How I miss all those smiles and the people wearing them!

Considering that this has had over 12,000,000 view on the site I saw it on and that doesn't count all of the people who have embedded it like I am, I am probably the last person in this community to have seen this.

It is still amazing and if you have seen it, I suspect that you wouldn't mide seeing it again.

EDIT: added the text

In the past 7 weeks, I have taken an incredible trip to Africa, prepared the outline and abstract for a paper to be presented in Budapest in August and started work on my PhD. I have read more than 2000 pages of works on economics, development, Buddhism, Christianity and Islam. I have tried to maintain some semblence of normality - not really normality but continutity of sameness - particularly in how I have interacted in this community.

I have realized in the past few days that I can not keep this up right now. I am not sure how I will keep up my interactions but I certainly cannot get involved in the day to day drama in this community. It increases my frustration levels and ultimately achieves nothing.

I think there are incredibly rich concepts that could be developed in looking at the feedback mechanisms and group dynamics of this community. It takes time and thought (and time for the thought) and I can't afford it anymore or at least right now.

In the past months I have developed a deep place in my heart for problems centered on providing access to safe drinking water. I will continue to work on that but not on the scale I have worked in the past.

I will probably still pop my head into Word Association :-D It is fun and mindless and requires little time for the laughs it often brings me.

I have committed to help David on his Worldwide Connectory but time wise I am going to have to limit my involvement there as well.

I have already dropped out of all of the groups that I shared with one member because I choose not to deal with him. We still share membership in <Ned> but I doubt that he is going to cause problems there.

I am going to be spending the next 4 days working almost non-stop with my doctoral adviser on refining frameworks for Buddhist economics and Sufficiency Economies in preparation for an international Conference at Chulalongkorn University in a few weeks, for a UNESCO conference we will help host in December and for getting my research proposal completed for next month.

On Monday I am leaving the hinterlands for 5 days and going to Bangkok. Next week is Songkran - Thai New Year. It is about my favorite holiday in Thailand. It is a 4-5 day water festival during the hottest time of the year. There is no way to stay dry during Songkran. That is to say that you have a few days of being cool and being kewl! But it has its more gracious and serious side as well. The Songkran tradition is recognized as a valuable custom for the Thai community, society and religion. The value for family is to provide the opportunity for family members to gather in order to express their respects to the elders by pouring scented water onto the hands of their parents and grandparents and to present them gifts. The elders in return wish the youngsters good luck and prosperity. To that end,I will be visiting with my sister-in-law's family.

While I am in Bangkok I will be learning about a large Buddhist community, Santi Asoke. The chairman of the community is a PhD student in my program as well and (be still my heart) he is my age! He speaks English well and we have kind of agreed that I will help him improve his writing and speaking and he will help me understand the Buddhism and Thai culture that I need to understand. I will also be doing some research at the Chulalongkorn Library and doing some more reading. It probably won't be much of a relaxing time but it will feel good being someplace different and being around some people who speak English. (I got really spoiled in my 3 weeks in Uganda where everyone I spoke to could understand me and I could understand them!)

All of this is to say that I am going to be scare, at least in terms of my prowling around and keeping on top of everything going on in the community. If there is anything that you need me for, please message me because I am only an e-mail away.

Earlier today I posted a suggestion for onet regarding what I thought be a means of tagging groups so that they would be easier to find. Thomas asked me a question and I said that the real answer might come from nmw since he was the expert on such things but that he hadn't checked in yet.

A bit later Norbert posted to the thread and posted some links. He made a comment about if I wanted someone to participate in a discussion why didn't I just pm them. I thought he was reffering to the example that I had given in the post. looking at it now he probably meant that I should have pmed him to participate in that thread if I wanted him to. I didn't think it was necessary since I was sure he would find it when he got on. I was right.

Anyhow, I rent and checked out the links that he had and I didn't understand why they supported his statement that it wouldn't work. I asked again. I got ignored. So I pmed him the following message:

--- Linda "Blessed by Gulu!" Nowakowski wrote:

I didn't ask you to explain what was wrong with my idea to hear myself talk.

I thought that I made it clear that I didn't understand the material in your links.

What do I need to do to get an answer

He responded:

Linda,

due to your repeated and escalating remarks depicting me as a dubious character, I find that I no longer trust you. When you supported insinuating remarks make about me, I removed my positive feedback to your personal profile. Since then your criticism has persisted, and it has also remained unreasonable. I prefer to interact with you publicly, since there you can no longer hide your scathing remarks.

Thanks for trying to understand.

Norbert

I believe that the reference to supporting insinuating remarks goes Waaaaaaaaaaay back to something that Michael Maranda said that I (and a lot of other people) agreed with and gave positive feedback. (no negative feedback) ...I can't even find the frigging post... wish I could.

And...I am sorry, Norbert, but there are many times when I simply don't understand your posts. And when I say that I don't understand and you keep going and I feel like you are taunting me, I get upset. Why can't you believe that some people can not understand you

Now, regarding my repeated and escalating remarks about him being a dubious character. He might be referring to this post.

By Linda "Blessed by Gulu!" Nowakowski (2089), Mon, 02 Apr 2007 16:55:46 PDT

Comment feedback score: 11 (* * * * * * * * * *)

I think that some of us are talking past each other because we are looking at different definitions of negative feedback

Negative feedback: 1) any negative response to a comment or action, verbal, physical etc. 2) points with a - sign in front of them that are distributed on onet to demonstrate negative feedback (1).

Some people can tolerate and deal with negative feedback of either genre and others cannot. Some of those who can not deal with negative feedback can in fact deal with negative feedback if it is constructive. In order for feedback to be constructive, it must be owned.

I really appreciate Thomas reminding us of that.

As long as there is community, there will be negative feedback in one form or another. It certainly doesn't require intricate structures that cost money (like the onet software) to implement.

The main problem with the ability to administer anonymous negative feedback (which the onet software does enable in this particular community) is that it allows people to take potshots from a blind. That is not always a bad thing.

Not that I have done it but....lets say Norbert says something that just really pisses me off (not that he EVER has or would do that). A -1 on his comment might cool me down and keep me from chopping his head off. (not that that isn't a solution I have considered in the past.) IF Norbert isn't too thin skinned, he thinks about it briefly and lets it pass. Maybe though, after a month or so, he notices that each of those posts that have gotten negged were posts that had links to his commercial enterprises. Maybe he learns something.

Me, I would jump out there and very undiplomatically tell him that I am sick and tired of his self serving links and I would have a brouhaha that would generate maybe over 187 comments in less than a week with people calling other people names, threatening to leave because I am an inconsiderate bully.

On the other hand, if we just recognized that we only grown through mistakes. If we only ever say nice things and never disagree, then everyone is the worse off for it.

Maybe we should just look at anonymous negs as boos, moans or groans and quit running to "Mommy" saying "Jenny doesn't like my joke..."

Is there any one who sees that as character assassination (sorry .. I don't have a question mark key right now and am too tired to go find a QM to copy and paste here). If I meant all of that stuff we would have see the post somewhere here on onet where I jumped him for putting in those links.

I want to make a public apology to Norbert for believing that he had a sense of humor and and could understand the irony (2a).

irony

2 a : the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning b : a usually humorous or sardonic literary style or form characterized by irony c : an ironic expression or utterance

3 a (1) : incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result (2) : an event or result marked by such incongruity b : incongruity between a situation developed in a drama and the accompanying words or actions that is understood by the audience but not by the characters in the play -- called also dramatic irony, tragic irony

Instead the entire situation has turned out ironic (3a).

So much for wit. I guess I have to stay straight. And, since he won't answer my question, I guess I have to stay stupid. Does this mean I can blame my stupidity on Norbert (QM)

Passion: Strong, enthusiastic devotion to a cause, ideal, or goal and tireless diligence in its furtherance.

I thought that I had passion when I was 20. I was involved and active but I was just learning to see.

I thought I had passion when I was 30. I was involved and active but I was a new mother looking after my own.

I thought I had passion when I was 40. I was involved and active but my vision had only spread to my community.

I thought I had passion when I was 50. I was involved and active but it turned out that I was only just beginning.

At nearly 60 I have seen hunger for power, status, position, hunger for wealth, possessions, stuff, things, ALL of it nothing more than GREED. In the attempt to satisfy that greed, I have seen people lie, cheat, steal, risk lives (their own and others), hurt people unintentionally and intentionally, and any manner of other atrocious behaviors. People will do anything to attempt to have a bigger piece of the pie for themselves.

I have seen these behaviors in myself, my family, my friends, my neighbors, and in strangers. I have seen these behaviors in ever place I have lived or visited.

And what does all of this bring us as individuals, families, communities, countries? Peace? Satisfaction? Joy? Happiness?

At nearly 60 I have at last visited Africa. I have met people who have no-things: not retirement security, neither health security nor health, neither food nor water, neither parents nor guardians, neither peace nor safety: all of which I have had or have in more abundance than they can even dream of. In these people I have met people who are gracious, generous and loving. I have been humbled, awed and inspired.

In this next phase of my life, I hope that I am going to be able to use the skills I have to help empower people to obtain happiness: a life with sufficient food and water, clothing and housing, health care and education opportunities. A life in harmony with the people around them and with nature. A life with an abundance of love, smiles, laughs, hugs, kisses and joys. A life with the internal and spiritual strength and the family and community support to help through the inevitable pains, tears and losses. A life that has enough "things" and "stuff" that it is comfortable but not so much that someone else does without. A life described by the Buddha and shared with me (a Christian) here in Thailand as the Middle Way.

So now, my passion points everything in my life toward seeing how I can share the talents I have to help in that goal. I see my teaching skills being used to empower people with language, information and technologies that will open doors to them to lift themselves out of poverty. I see my teaching and writing skills in some small way also working toward clarifying faulty assumptions that have driven us to the brink of destruction. I see my life as a visible manifestation of my beliefs and I try each day to work on the many areas where the self-centered greed still has me in its nasty grip.

Specific Tasks:

• Savings and loan amortization tables for LiA - Done but need to be sent. SENT
• Creative early childhood education links for a woman from the Gulu conference - I have them but I have lost my notebook from Gulu with her name and address in it.
• A copy of the Thai report on Sufficiency Economies - I have requested it in electronic form but again, I have lost the names and addresses of the folks who wanted it. SENT
• Investigate how to encourage the development of open source financial software specifically for the use of LiA (and maybe <Ned>?) but perhaps more generally available to other NGOs I am finished with this project for a while - Mark is still working on it
• See if I can find connections for Charity's (my Kenyan Fashion Consultant) passion to save and restore the water sources that are being lost to deforestation and population expansion in a part of Kenya that she loves. Done
• Work on my PhD to see if I can interpret Buddhist Economics for a Western audience and promote sufficiency economies. Well under way
• Work on no-more-big-white-trucks.org - The ugliest manifestation of greed I have seen in recent years. Looking for assistance.
• Work on sufficiency-economy.net - Finish editing the Thai translations to English. almost done - if the university would just PLEASE give me the DNS addies. sigh TIT

But, now that I am home, the first priority is getting my grades submitted for the semester.

Thanks, David, for inspiring me to organize my thoughts.

[**Edited by author: Linda &quot;Blessed by Gulu!&quot; Nowakowski on 07 Mar 2007 03:22 PST: oops...had problems...needed to reboot and edited this to complete it ]

[**Edited by author: Linda &quot;Blessed by Gulu!&quot; Nowakowski on 15 May 2007: updated the check list.]